A few secrets are good for any relationship – they make you a woman of mystery, right? Well, I’ve got one now from my partner of eight years and father of my three children (may he continue to slumber peacefully in ignorance beside me as I type, bless him). My secret is ‘work’.
Oh he knows I work, all right. He’s a big supporter of anything that drags income into the family unit. I work from home, around the children, and he works in an office. Yes, we are the standard model of the twenty-first century suburban economic unit. Cute!
It’s just that in the run up to Christmas we made a pact. We listed everything that had to be done – presents, organise camping trip, spend time at the children’s school, renovate huge chunks of the house and garden, teach youngest to read, eldest to play the piano, middle-est to sleep in her own bed. We allocated responsibilities and promised each other not to take on anything more until everything on this daunting ‘must do’ list was ticked off.
And we had had a long break to get over it.
I had every intention of focusing on making sweets for the school fair and spending quality time with babies – but within twenty-four hours I was surreptiously shooting off more proposals for jobs and articles. Well, you know what it is like, you get a good idea and what are you supposed to do? Sit on it?
So now I have more deadlines – big jobs to squeeze into tiny timeframes – made more complicated by the fact I can’t let on about them. So I am sneaking around the house, texting from the loo, emailing after lights out, making muffled phone calls or pretending work calls are wrong numbers or just ‘good friends’.
No, I am not having an affair. I’m trying to manage my career.
I do have other secrets of course – but hey, if I posted them on a blog, then I wouldn’t be a woman of mystery, would I?
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1 comments:
Kirsten, Kirsten! we only make these pacts so we can ensure the man actually does SOMETHING! we certainly don't need to be told what has to be done with kids, around the house etc etc. We only have to roll out of bed and open our eyes and the myriad of tasks awaiting the day confront us. May he sleep peacefully while you work but look out when he wakes up!
Needless to say - being separated - I work all the time and just keep all the money and with any spare cash - pay people to do housework etc ...NB: stop having more babies - you've done everything Peter Costello has asked!
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